Valerian And The City Of A Thousand Planets

Year Released: 2017
Main Stars: Dane DeHaan, Cara Delevingne, Clive Owen, Rihanna , Ethan Hawke , Sasha Luss , Pauline Hoarau            
Review Date: February 2018
Last watched: February 2018
Number Watches: 1
Format Watched: BLU RAY

Scifi and the associates effects varies from budget to budget. Sometimes the bigger budget shows will use good judgement to play down the elements and you don’t even realise there’s been a green-screen involved. Not so Valerian. ‘Visually Stunning’ must have been used in some review somewhere as that’s exactly what you get throughout – a big sign saying “EYE-POPPING-CANDY.”

So what? Loads of Scifi does this. Yeah, but there’s a balance with plot and character that’s been missed here.

I get that there’s a plot and I get that there are some pretty childish attempts to have character background but this is a large movie that throws in scenes to make it look grown up and yet they often end up dull and repetative, without life even though there are masses of effects and non-real characters scattered all over the place. The emotional scenes were drawn out and could have done with more experienced actors.  Dane – sorry, guy, but you were flat and lifeless compared to Cara who I would have preferred being the main lead.
Rhianna’s scenes were interesting but clearly more titlation than necessary.

Really good looking film that seems to be for kids, without any depth and a lot of adult textures that make it not really for kids after all. 10 for effort, 1 for understanding the needs of the audience. Either aim at kids or adults because it takes a very skilled team to walk the thin line that covers both and I dont think this team did that.

BluRay Extra: Loads. A really good use of the Bluray format. Stuff like the loads of small interviews with the actors including those that were motion captured (good, I hate it when their work is overlooked as just an effect) and outtakes that make it look like everyone was really enjoying themselves – especially Cara! Why was this feeling missing from the movie itself? Absolutely 10 out of 10 for the effects team and their work as it’s spectacular and the time and effort involved has clearly been massive.

Watchability (once, twice, etc.)
Twice.
Keep DVD?
No
Watch if on TV?
Yes
Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid?
Snog. Bold, Scifi with glossy lips and lots of virtual action.

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Posted in 2010s, Action, Comedy, Comic / 'Graphic Novel', Film Review, Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid, SciFi, Sexy, Snog, Super Hero, Twice, Watchability | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

W Delta Z (WAZ)

Year Released: 2007
Main Stars: Stellan Skarsgård, Melissa George, Ashley Walters, Tom Hardy , Paul Kaye , Selma Blair
Review Date: January 2018
Last watched: January 2018
Number Watches: 1
Format Watched: TV

Really rubbish. Bad American accents, small, enclosed spaces, sometimes woeful acting and a feeling that nobody wanted to be there for what was a dull, drama-less waste of time.

It made me think of actors CVs and whether they take some roles just to say “Hey, look! I’m still on the market!”

No offense to Stellen, Melissa, Tom or Selma as I think they are all a bit better than this and I’m going to go out on a limb and say it was the script and direction that made it dreadful.

What a nonsense ending as well.

 

Watchability (once, twice, etc.)
None.
Keep DVD?
No
Watch if on TV?
No
Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid?
Avoid.

Posted in 2010s, Avoid, Crap, Crime, Don't, Film Review, Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid, Thriller, Watchability | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Hunt / Jagten

Year Released: 2012
Main Stars: Mads Mikkelsen, Thomas Bo Larsen, Annika Wedderkopp, Lasse Fogelstrøm , Susse Wold , Alexandra Rapaport , Lars Ranthe
Review Date: February 2018
Last watched: February 2018
Number Watches: 1
Format Watched: DVD

 

To me Mads has always looked like a bad guy. He’s cast as the villain a lot. In this film he isn’t the evil baddy although you might think he’s still a bad guy in a way… or maybe not… sorry, trying to be cryptic to avoid giving away the plot.

What I mean is dont think of him as a super villain, he’s just ordinary and plays it exceptionally well. It’s a brilliant piece of acting supported by other great performances
including the wonderful Annika (always good to see a kid looking more natural and not looking like a kid dumped in front of a camera and told not to stare) and the equally good Alexandra, Thomas, Lasse, Susse, Lars, etc, etc. In fact the only bad part played here was that of Thomas’s hair which seemed to be from a different era, perhaps somewhere in the 70s.

Anyway, it all works and is a great thought-provokingly unsettling film. Not gore-filled or horror or anything like that, just that look-away, cringe feeling when people do things you don’t want to know about and think you wouldn’t do yourself.

I dont think I would watch it again but it’s one of those that will keep haunting me (in a thoughtful way) and presenting that People-Arent-Like-That-Are-They?-Of-Course-They-Are-And-Deep-Down-You-Know-It feeling.

Not for kids but perhaps worth seeing to make you take stock of your own attitude to others

DVD Extras: None.

Watchability (once, twice, etc.)
Once.
Keep DVD?
No
Watch if on TV?
Once
Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid?
Marry. I know I wont watch it again but I cant fault the simple and effective way it’s done.

Posted in 2010s, Drama, Film Review, Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid, Marry, Once, Watchability | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Underworld : Blood Wars

Year Released: 2016
Main Stars: Kate Beckinsale, Theo James, Tobias Menzies
Review Date: January 2018
Last watched: December 2017
Number Watches: 1
Format Watched: Blu-ray

Kate in leather again. The story seems to have been thought out and not just Vampires and Werewolves thrown in a pit together.
Having said that… there are a lot of boring fights and seem to have no particular outcome and some dull touches of stupidity from supposed 100 year old vampires. Hey, I guess they get stuck in their ways though.

Was fun to watch although, and this isn’t meant to be funny, very dark. I mean the lighting was off putting and I’m sure there can be ways to brighten up even the darkest night on celluloid.

Blu-ray Extras:  Making of, analysis of the characters, interviews although a little short and to the point. Nothing boring and mostly all watchable but seeming a little self-promoting rather than friendly, confidential or candid.

 

Watchability (once, twice, etc.)
Twice.
Keep DVD?
Yes. Defo box set.
Watch if on TV?
Yes
Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid?
Snog-arooooooooooooowl!! Gnash, gnash! Chomp, chomp! Slap-a-da-leather!…. ahem.

Posted in 2010s, Action, Fantasy, Film Review, Horror, Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid, Snog, Twice, View of a lifestyle, Watchability | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

She’s Out Of My League

Year Released: 2010
Main Stars: Jay Baruchel, Alice Eve, T.J. Miller
Review Date: January 2018
Last watched: December 2017
Number Watches: 1
Format Watched: TV

Bit rubbish.

Really didn’t hit any spots and the main guy unbelievable in that role.

Alice is really good looking. No doubt. Jay is really dorky looking. Equally no doubt. Both are very good for what they need to do. None of it gels though. It’s not something I could ever buy into. The others around them are obvious characters from the American Pie/Knocked Up/40 year old Virgin style ‘odd-ball guys’ but it’s all kinda forced and isn’t, well, funny.

I’d prefer a funny script than people trying to be funny so this one doesn’t do it for me. Some jokes in there but the whole thing feels like there’s an attempt to cash in on the joke-pack entourages that Hollywood thinks will pull the crowds.

Watchability (once, twice, etc.)
None.
Keep DVD?
No
Watch if on TV?
No
Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid?
Avoid.

Posted in 2010s, Avoid, Comedy, Don't, Film Review, Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid, Romantic Comedy, Watchability | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

The Lost City Of Z

Year Released: 2016
Main Stars: Charlie Hunnam, Robert Pattinson, Sienna Miller
Review Date: January 2018
Last watched: January 2018
Number Watches: 1
Format Watched: TV

A slow film with an interest in a past that inspired other archaeological-explorer-em-ups. However this one is very much a documentary of a character in the past. Not very exciting and quite an unhappy experience overall due to the nature of the story. Can’t fault the production although perhaps the script was a little dull in places. Just not a movie I’ll be watching again.

Not offensive but for all the adventure and daring-do it ended up being a bit uneventful. If you want to be interested in the subject then have a go but it’s really quite slow.

Watchability (once, twice, etc.)
Once. Maybe.
Keep DVD?
No
Watch if on TV?
No
Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid?
Snog because it questions our sense of who is ‘civilised’ and how we treat other tribes.

Posted in 2010s, Drama, Film Review, Historic, Hug, Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid, Once, Watchability | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Resident Evil 6 : The Final Chapter

Year Released: 2016
Main Stars: Milla Jovovich, Iain Glen, Ali Larter, Ever Anderson
Review Date: January 2018
Last watched: December 2017
Number Watches: 1
Format Watched: BluRay

A bit of an epic last film in the series with a lot of ends being tied up. Feels good to see a few twists and turns that mean something rather than just another monster. Mind you, there are plenty of monsters. I’d have liked to see more of these and why they exist, you know, the reason these particular monsters are lurking in the areas they’re in. Probably me getting old.
Mila is on good form as is Iain who has a few nice scenes near the end and a strong performance from Ever too. The action, direction, locations, sets, effects, are all fantastic as you’d expect.

Loved the Zombie hordes! Nice idea with only a few plot holes.

If you like Resident Evil then you will like this one and if you’re not a fan then you might as well give it a miss as this is all about the world of Alice, T Virus, The Umbrella Corporation (love that name!)

In Franchise: For me, the first and this one are the best. There’s something to get your teeth into (so to speak) and think about rather than same-old same-old.

BluRay Extras:  Good interviews, loads of making of and an in-film pop-out chat with Mila and Paul showing some parts of the making and what they thoughts about it. Actually quite a homely, friendly feature. Yep, good.

Watchability (once, twice, etc.)
Twice.
Keep DVD?
Box set only.
Watch if on TV?
Yeah.
Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid?
Snog.

Posted in 2010s, Action, Film Review, Game Conversion, Hug, Snog, Marry, Avoid, SciFi, Snog, Twice, Watchability, Zombie | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment